New York Minute (4/10)
2004 by Tony Medley
My aunts were
identical twins. What I know about identical twins, I know from them.
They would get up in the morning, even after one of them had married and
moved away, and dress in the same clothes. Identical twins are formed by
the same sperm and egg. The zygote (fertilized egg) splits sometime
before the 12th day after conception and prior to
implantation in the uterus. Both grow to be human beings, and they have
the same DNA but different fingerprints.
Jane Ryan (Ashley
Olsen) and Roxy (Mary-Kate Olsen) are twins, but apparently not
identical. They certainly look alike, but itís never explained whether
theyíre identical or fraternal. Their personalities are anything but
similar. One is an anal-retentive control freak and the other is a free
spirited rock music lover.
Thatís the premise
of this movie. They are different and they donít get along. Jane is to
give a speech that will determine whether she gets a scholarship to
Oxford and Roxy is cutting school so she can go to a rock concert. Roxy
is being pursued by an obsessed truancy officer, Max Lomax (Eugene
Levy), who is stuck in a role that is patently ludicrous.
While on their way
to their respective destinations, someone drops a computer chip with
thousands of purloined songs in Roxyís purse and wannabe Chinese
gangster Bennie Bang (Anglo Andy Richter) is trying to get it back.
Since heís a limo driver he offers them a ride into the City. He tries
to kidnap them to get the chip but they get away. However, in the
process, Jane loses her day planner that contains her speech. The rest
of the film is Bennie and Max pursuing Jane and Roxy, and Jane trying to
get her speech back. Along the way Jane and Roxy meet a couple of hunks,
Trey Lipton (Jared Padalecki) and Jim (Riley Smith), who become smitten
question, this is a film for teenagers. In fact, the MPAA should
consider a rating called TO (teenagers only). Levyís character is so
absurd that I donít think even teenagers would find it humorous. That
said, I didnít mind this too much. It has good cinematography of New
York and not enough music from the Canadian punk pop band Simple Plan
(nominated as Best New Artist at the 2003 MTV Video Music Awards for
their video Addicted). Thereís one segment of the film thatís
at a rock concert and the music was pretty good.
The Olsen sisters
are becoming cultural icons in the teen world. They were regulars on the
TV Series Full House from the time they were 9 months old. Then
they became the executive producer-stars of a hugely successful home
video series with nearly 40 million units sold. They launched the mary-kateandashley
brand, which includes a popular fashion and lifestyle products line,
childrenís book collection and videogame franchise, which will
collectively gross over $1 billion at retail this year. Itís not
surprising that they co-produced this Warner Bros. Feature.
I canít recommend
this to any adult. But if you have children they should like it and
adults shouldnít be bored out of their skulls. Iíve seen worse.
May 2, 2004